Teens and Kids Body Image Problem

Children Obsessed with Image

By Dr. Susan Mendelsohn
eDiets Psychologist
For the Trim Kids

Is your child becoming obsessed with his/her looks? Have you noticed a change in your child's emotional state... a change specifically related to his/her body image? Is your child acting out in ways that differ from before? Do you attribute these changes to puberty?

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If you think these are normal growing pains, please reconsider. True, children go through stages. However, when these stages are extreme and maladaptive, it's time to intervene.

Eating disorders and other weight problems know no boundaries. As human beings, we have a tendency to overemphasize the superficial components of ourselves (body weight, shape, size and overall physical appearance), resulting in thousands of unhappy and seriously depressed young adults and children.

It's time to break this unhealthy relationship between weight and worth!

I have compiled some guidelines for helping your child cope with their ever-changing bodies. Please step in before it's too late.

1. Consider the ways in which your beliefs, attitudes and behaviors about your own body and the bodies of others have been shaped by the forces of sexism. Then, educate your child about:(a) the basic genetic differences in body types, and (b) the nature of prejudice.

2. Closely analyze your dreams and goals for your children and other loved ones. Ask yourself if you are overemphasizing beauty, body shape or weight (especially for girls).

3. Avoid placing judgments upon individuals who do not meet your standards for beauty. Refrain from stating something such as, "I'll love you more if you would just lose a few pounds," or "don't eat so much,"쳌 or "you should try to look just like those models." Give your child unconditional positive regard. This means: accept your child as a worthwhile human being, despite his/her faults. Weight should never factor into your child's worth!

4. Reduce teasing, criticism and staring. These behaviors only serve to reinforce the disapproval of being overweight and the admiration of slenderness.

5. Educate yourself and discuss with your children the dangers of trying to alter one's body shape through dieting. Utilize the holistic program that eDiets offers to help yourself and your child learn what's healthy and what's not.

6. Learn about and discuss with your children the value of moderate exercising for stamina and cardiovascular fitness.

7. Learn about -- and discuss with your children -- the importance of eating a variety of foods in well-balanced meals. Consume these meals at least three times a day.

8. Avoid labeling foods as "good" or "bad."쳌 Do not dichotomize foods into good, safe, no fat or low fat vs. bad, dangerous or fattening.

9. Be a good role model in regard to sensible eating, sensible exercise and self-acceptance.

10. Make a commitment to exercise for your health rather than your weight. Feel good about exercise for the joy of feeling your body function effectively rather than for purposes of purging your body to compensate for calories eaten.

11. Make a commitment to not avoid activities such as swimming, dancing and sunbathing simply because they call attention to your weight and shape.

12. Refuse to wear clothes that are uncomfortable or that you dislike simply because they divert attention away from your weight or shape.

13. Practice appreciating human beings (especially women) for who they are and what they are saying, thinking and feeling, rather than for their body size and shape.

14. Make a commitment to help your children appreciate and resist ways in which television, magazines and other forms of media distort the true diversity of body types. (Unfortunately, the media often makes a correlation between slim and powerful, exciting and sensual.)

15. Do not limit your child's caloric intake unless a physician has instructed you to do so for the sake of their physical health. For more information on children's nutrition, please contact the Trim Kids dietitian.

16. Allow and encourage your child to be active and to enjoy what their bodies can do and feel like doing.

17. Give boys and girls the same encouragement and opportunities.

18. Be careful never to suggest that girls are less important than boys. Make sure their household responsibilities are divided evenly, without establishing stereotypical rules for male or female activities.

19. Promote the self-esteem and self-respect of your children in every aspect of their being, including intellectual, athletic and social endeavors.

This list of guidelines will not only enhance your overall relationship with your children (making you closer and more intimate), but also reduce the chance of them developing a distorted body image and/or a serious eating disorder later in life.

Now, that's a treat for everyone!

If you are worried about your weight AND your child's weight, be sure to check out the new eDiets Trim Kids program. We offer a wealth of information to keep you and your family on the straight and narrow. Click here to learn more.